Miscellaneous · Uncategorized

A Really Stupid Post

This post is so lame I captioned a white square for lack of a more relevant picture.

I figure I might as well slack in quality as well as quantity when it comes to blogging. I don’t slack half-way! :P

Last week I caught myself asking if I could borrow someone’s Excedrin. It struck me that no one can really borrow Excedrin. I mean, I can borrow the bottle and take a few pills, but once those pills are took, I highly doubt anyone’s going to want them back. So it made me think of all the things people usually ask to borrow that they should not.

One of those things is napkins.

Don’t ask to borrow napkins. If you’re wiping your face with it, I don’t want it back, thank you. You may ask to have some napkins. That would be fine. But they go in the trash when you’re done. Not back to me.

Feminine pads are another item you don’t borrow. Do I even need to explain why? And yes, I’ve been asked by a couple people if they could “borrow” a pad from me. Keep it. It’s all yours. No, really.

And sunscreen. In actuality, you are borrowing the container of sunscreen. There’s no way after applying sunscreen that you can scrape it off and put it back in the bottle for reuse. And if there was a way, it would not be worth doing. Same goes for lotion, hand sanitizer, and all makeup products. Although I will accept, “May I borrow your tube of lip gloss?”

Newsflash: I’ve been writing fan fiction. H2O fan fiction. Yeah. I’m that lazy. I can’t even write 19th century spin-offs anymore. It’s all about Australian mermaids. Oh! But I am learning some fantastic Aussie slang in the meantime!

For example, did you know that “grundies” are slang for underwear? I’ve read some sites that define it as “boring, uncomfortable underwear” but I’m not sure how accurate that is since there’s now an entire site called Grundies dedicated to very distinctly Australian underpants. Ah, the things I learn whilst writing.

Okay, I’ve been having a blast at work. When I get enough coffee in my system before clocking on I have the energy to be and find everything hilarious. :P Today I was starting some fresh pots of coffee while Matt, one of our managers, made croutons on the shelf next to me. We had a little radio playing and another manager was fiddling with it to find a good station and then Matt mentioned Pandora. I mused silently for a while and then said, “Wouldn’t it be great if some girl was named Pandora?”

And Matt said, “Whyyy?”

“Can’t you imagine how great the jokes would be at her birthday parties? People would be sitting around and someone would shake one of the presents and it would be like, ‘Don’t open that, it’s Pandora’s box!'”

It was such a bad joke that he gave me his “what is wrong with you?” look plus a chuckle when he could think of nothing else to do but laugh. Yeah. I have that affect on people. Effect? Wait, don’t tell me!  Affect is to have an influence on, or cause a change in, and effect is a result brought about by a cause, sooo… I’m going with effect. Okay? We good? Good.


13 thoughts on “A Really Stupid Post

  1. Oh yea, I went there! I read it all! And I’ll name my first daughter Pandora..just so you can her her some boxes fer her birthday!

    1. Probably a lot like my manager. Odd look, vague smirk, then you’d be reduced to chuckling at a very silly joke because you don’t know what else to do with such ridiculousness. :P

    1. Oh! And about three times today I almost grammar-corrected some strangers at work and I thought of you. They were saying, “Is there any napkins over there?” It made me wince. And this happened three times!!

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