My dreams are getting crazy again. I’m usually a frequent/vivid dreamer, but when I’m sick and my sleep is interrupted every handful of hours I remember the elaborate ones almost every night.
In the first one, my grandpa was taking me on a very inaccurate tour of the capital. And by inaccurate, I mean our capital building is not on a military base where politicians give impassioned speeches to marines about the benefits of large families and homeschool. But that’s what was going on at one podium, while in a small football stadium, a group was graduating from the Naval Academy. That’s where Grandpa wanted to take me, to go shake hands and say congratulations. (He made me do that at Tops in Blue. So that part was in character.) However, I refused with a pouty face, saying there was only one naval officer I was interested in and he wasn’t there. (Also accurate.) So we moved on to the capital building which was surprisingly normal from the outside, but once in it became a labyrinthine community dance studio. We wanted to practice our swing dancing, but each room was taken by very gifted dancers and musicians, (complicated ballet recitals, and composers/players of the cello) and feeling intimidated, we just kept wandering the rooms. Finally, we were starving, and decided to call it quits.
But once outside the building, I was no longer with Grandpa, but Grandma was driving me in the pickup truck down a windy mountain pass at 90MPH. (Mum: Hah! Grandma wouldn’t drive 90 miles an hour if she was in a car, and it was the speed limit!) I tried to be as nice as possible when declaring my absolute terror, but she shot back with, “Bethany! I’ve been driving back and forth from this base since before you were born! Don’t sass me, young lady!” Thus, I politely kept my mouth shut until we reached the bottom of the mountain, only to be hindered by a blockade of tanks! Me swain’s brother was there, and being the loyal granddaughter that I am, I immediately tattled on my grandmother’s erratic driving. He laughed, and offered us an escort off the base. I accepted under the assumption that driving between tanks would force my grandma to drive slow. It did. It ended with our gallant escort taking the lead of the procession on foot whilst singing a song in Spanish.
Next crazy random dream! This one, I’m really hoping is not a premonition, because it was really… uncomfortable. :P
I was on some kind of outdoor obstacle course that was part of a reality show called Jungle Survival, only it was between shoots and we were all trying to get some extra practice in before the cameras started rolling, but I was preoccupied with running from a bully. And when I say bully, I mean a very fit, very tall, very rough looking blonde man with a buzz cut who set scary traps for the other contestants and had an unwelcome infatuation with me. I found part of the course to hide in that was a lot like those enclosed net platforms that take you up to a mega slide at a bounce house, or McDonald’s play place, or Discovery Zone. You know, where there’s an open space just big enough for a person to climb up, and then crawl to the other end of the first net, or mesh platform, or foam thing, and at the end of it there’s another hole you climb up from, and so on, and so forth until you reach the top. One of those. Only it was dark, and shadowy, and not something fun from my childhood. *coughs*Or a week ago when I was at a bouncy house*coughs*
Well, it was a bad hiding place anyway, because the creepy guy found me. As he was gaining on me, something miraculously drew his attention enough to make him stop terrorizing me for a little while. It was his brother who had also entered the contest, and had lived with the constant bullying of Creepy Guy #1. So obviously I felt really bad for him, although… the super uncomfortable part is that the brother was Patrick Swayze as a body builder. Patrick Swayze’s bloated face on a beefed up body, and yes, it was just as disturbing and unattractive as you could possibly imagine. No, worse. He was shirtless. And super sweaty from practicing on the course. I’m pretty sure there was something slightly off about him mentally, and that’s where most of the bullying found its fuel. Well, Creepy Guy #1 started really getting into the verbal abuse, then. I don’t even remember what he said, but it upset me enough to try standing up for the brother, which for some stupid turn of my dream brain meant I started dating Patrick Swayze: Body Builder on the spot. *shudder* And then he hugged me, which my dream brain was trying to tell me was totally wonderful, and I should be happy because I was going to be protected by a sweet mammoth for all time now, and dream me was buying it! Then the moment I woke up and thought about it, I felt sick, and the dream-memory of his disgustingly oily, beefy body encompassing mine in his gratuitous hug keeps making my stomach turn.
Moral of the story, kids: Don’t date out of pity.
*convulses with shuddering and cringing*
I need another brain purge.